Alcohol and Other Drugs

Alcoholics and Narcotics Annonymous - List of Local Meetings

For Parents of College Students

When Someone Close Drinks Too Much
The person who has someone close who drinks too much has plenty of company.  It has been said that people with drinking problems hurt only themselves.  That isn't true.  They also hurt their families, friends, fellow workers, employers and others. 

We have ten million problem drinkers and alcoholic people in this country.  Experience shows that at least four other people are affected by the behavior of each of these individuals.  That makes 40 million people sharing alcohol problems at second hand.  However, looking at it another way - as we should - there are 40 million potential helpers who have a personal stake in helping "someone close" find a way to healthy living.

Help is now available in most communities for the troubled drinker who goes or is guided to treatment.  Such help can be given in three stages:
-Learn about the illness and sources of treatment.
-Guide the "someone close" to treatment and 
-Support the person during treatment and after.

Doing this demands effort, patience and, most importantly, genuine personal concern.

LEARN
Many people who live with them every day do not know and understand the signs of problem drinking and of the illness of alcoholism.  They are honestly baffled by the problem drinker's behavior.  Why does the person act this way?  What are the differences between a social drinker and one who is dependent on alcohol?  When is the "someone close" in danger?  And of critical importance - what are the early signs of troubled drinking which, if heeded, in time could avert alcoholism and related major life problems?

Reading some of the factual booklets about drinking, alcohol misuse, and alcoholism that are available at the UHCS can give many of the answers.  Sometimes the quickest grasp on the local situation may be gained by joining a group such as Al-Anon.  These family members and friends of problem drinkers usually know where help is available.  They also share practical suggestions on day-to-day living with one who has a drinking problem.  Alateen groups offer similar help to younger members of families with alcohol troubles.

GUIDE
You may have learned to better understand problem drinking, and already made contact with nearby sources of service.  This does not mean that "someone close" will cooperate at once by going for treatment. 

If there is one thing true of problem drinkers, it is that, as with all people, each one is different - different in human needs and responses, as well as in reasons for drinking, reactions to alcohol and readiness for treatment. 

You are in a favorable position to help your relative or friend, because you do know a good deal about his unique qualities and his way of life.  And having made the effort to gain some understanding of the signs and effects of problem drinking, you should be in a good position to consider a strategy for helping him/her.

Be active, get involved.  Don't be afraid to talk about the drinking problem honestly and openly.  It is easy to be too polite, or to duck the issue by saying "after all, it's their private affair."  But it isn't polite or considerate to let someone destroy his/her family or life.  You will find that most people with drinking troubles really want to talk it out. 

Be compassionate, be patient - but be willing to act.  Experience proves that preaching doesn't work.  A nudge or push at the right time can help.  It also shows that you care.  Push may even come to shove when the troubled drinker must chose between losing family or job, or going to treatment. 

Thousands of alcoholic people have been helped when a spouse, employer, or court official made treatment a condition of continuing family relationships, job, or probation.

You can't cure the illness, but when the crucial moment comes you can guide the person to competent help.

While Waiting for the "Right Time"
Reject certain myths that in the past have done great harm to alcoholic people and hampered those who would help them.  These untruths come from ingrained public attitudes that see alcoholism as personal misconduct, moral weakness, or even sin.  They are expressed in such declarations as "nothing can be done unless the alcoholic person wants to stop drinking", or "the alcoholic person must hit bottom", (that is lose health, job, home, family) "before he will want to get well".  These stubborn myths are not true and have been destructive.

The truth is that with alcoholism, as with other kinds of acute and chronic illnesses, early recognition and treatment intervention is essential - and rewarding.

DO

• Try to remain calm, unemotional and factually honest in speaking with the problem drinker about his/her behavior and its day-to-day consequences.
• Let the problem drinker know that you are reading and learning about alcoholism, attending Al-Anon or Alateen, and the like.
• Discuss the situation with someone you trust - a clergy person, social worker, a friend or some individual who has experienced alcoholism either personally or as a family member.
• Establish and maintain a healthy atmosphere in the home and try to include the alcoholic member in family life. 
• Explain the nature of alcoholism as an illness to the children in the family.
• Encourage new interests and participate in leisure-time activities that the problem drinker enjoys.  Encourage him/her to see old friends.
• Be patient and live one day at a time. Alcoholism generally takes a long time to develop, and recovery does not occur overnight.
• Try to accept setbacks and relapses with calm and understanding. 
• Refuse to ride with the alcoholic person if he insists on drinking and driving. 

DO NOT

• Attempt to punish, threaten, bribe, preach, or try to be a martyr.  Avoid emotional appeals which may only increase feelings of guilt and the compulsion to drink.
• Allow yourself to cover-up or make excuses for the alcoholic person or shield him from the realistic consequences of his behavior.
• Take over his/her responsibilities, leaving him with no sense of importance or dignity.
• Hide or dump bottles, or shelter the problem drinker from situations where alcohol is present.
• Argue with the alcoholic person when s/he is drunk.
• Try to drink along with the problem drinker.
• Above all, do not accept guilt for another's behavior.

Support
People with drinking problems have the same needs as all other people - food, clothing, shelter, health care, job, social contact and acceptance and, particularly, the need for self confidence and feelings of self-worth and dignity.  This is where "support" comes in. 

Treatment attempts to help people discover the relationship between problem drinking and real needs. Understanding what s/he would really strive for if not handicapped by this problem.  One goal is building up a capacity for control which is more possible during periods of sobriety.

2000

DO YOU REMEMBER?
By Amy Margulies, MS, LPC
Do you remember what you did last time you were drinking alcohol? How did you get home that night? Who were you with? What did you do? How do you know? If you can’t remember, that’s what is called a BLACKOUT. “Blackout” is the term used to define memory loss during a drinking episode. For many years it was considered the mark of serious alcohol dependency but, with many young people now experiencing blackouts, the focus has turned to recognizing blackouts as a sign of a different type of trouble: the trouble of drinking too much too fast.

Research is still being done on alcohol induced memory loss and there’s much yet to be learned. Here’s what is known so far: blackouts in the non-alcoholic are a result of drinking too much too fast; blackouts can occur for large measures of time or in series of missing memories from a drinking episode; college students who are in a blackout are more likely to engage in high risk behaviors than when they are not in a blackout; other people can’t tell that someone is having a blackout, nor can the person him/herself; women experience blackouts sooner than men because women’s blood alcohol content rises faster than men’s; the functioning of the hippocampus, which is the part of the brain associated with forming memories of facts and events, is disrupted by alcohol; it is possible that damage caused to the brain during blackouts may have long-term health related consequences.

College students who blackout often experience negative consequences like having unplanned and/or unprotected sex, driving drunk and/or engaging in other illegal and/or violent behaviors. Because alcohol use effects inhibition, judgment and motor control, the addition of memory loss can be particularly scary.

If you want to prevent the likelihood of having another blackout in the future, start with slowing your alcohol intake. Blackouts are less likely to occur when alcohol intake is regulated, both in terms of quantity and speed of ingestion. Does it mean you’ll have to change some patterns that you may have come to associate with drinking, things like doing shots in drinking games, using beer bongs, etc.? For that answer, you may want to fill in the blank: _____. If you are concerned about your drinking, or about someone else’s, please call the University Health and Counseling Services at 472-1305 and make an appointment to talk about it. We’re here to help.
2005

Beer Belly Blues

Did you know that a six pack of beer equals almost 1000 calories? Many students blame their college eating habits for their weight gain when alcohol may really be the culprit. Take a look to see if alcohol is weighing you down.

How can I get rid of the beer belly blues?
An obvious solution to weight gain from alcohol use is to decrease drinking. Pace yourself, sip instead of slam, set limits and stick to them, your body will thank you for it!

What are some lower calorie alternatives?

2003

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Updated: 08/12/2008

University Health & Counseling Services
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